Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Q+A!

I can't speak for all of mah derrrriciouz bloggy readerz, but I know that I spend a good amount of mah waking horaz daydreamin' about different fanciez of fame & stardom. Aside from imagining my fart-azz on the American Idol stage wooing the population wiff mah vocalz slaughtering the nation's collective eardrum, I often like to put myself into the storyline of some of my favorite moviez! Hairspray and The Texas Chainsaw Massacre have been big wastes of time for me (polar oppositez, I know) but I'd like to make it clear that I don't mean I've pretended to be acting in said filmz. I mean I've actually imagined my goofy rump shimmying & shaking on TV and being hunted by a psycho killer in real life. But as I reflect on the countless ficticious plotlinez that I have written myself into, I got to wondering...


If you could be in one movie, what would it be?

Horror filmz & musicals are two of my favo tingz in the entire world. Being scurred poopless and then bouncing along wiff a flamboyantly fabo soundtrack will constantly keep a smile on my face. So what would be the best kinda film to let me reach to durante mis sueños de diaz??? A combo of both of course! So therefore, if I had to be in any film, it would have to be...

The Nightmare Before Christmas

Ok...so it isn't necessarily scary viewing it now as a 23 year-old, but back when I was 7, that shit did get mah little heart a-racing @ some partz. But then again, once all those demonz & ghoulz, witchez & werewolvez, corpses & monstaz got all queerly fantastico Broadway on my azz, I forgot my fears and fell in lurrrve!

I used to alwayz try and scare my family when I was younger. I'd set up "haunted housez" in my room and then drag my unenthusiastic padres in there with me to show them what I'd done. They knew the schtick and would humor me by running out screaming upon seeing my stuffed animalz posed like ghosts under my bedsheets. Well, anyone who has seen this flick will totally understand why it fit into my childhood's extracurricular activities.

But it wasn't just all the crazy trix & treatz that got me obsessed with this film. I imagined myself singing all of the songz and receiving a standing ovation. My favo tune to burp along too was "Sally's Song." Sally was totally the introspectively depressed female singer/songwriter of the Nightmare crew and her lamenting ode to her secret love, the studly Jack Skellington (swoon!), got mah over-emotional eyez heaving Niagara tearz all over the place.

I'd imagine myself befriending Jack and becoming his supadupa BFF. In my make-believe world, I would provide council for Jack and I'd force his bony bunz to get into that Sally ho's bed sooner so I could steal the melodramatic lovesick spotlight! My fantasy = My rulez! After he & Sally were happily married, I would then be free to mope and sorrowfully warble mah Hotel Paper-esque melodiez. I had a huge crush on the little devil man Lock and I would follow him around Halloweentown, watching as he went on frightfully romantic datez with his witch GF Shock. So much heartbreak! I would cry to myself in my little mausoleum bedroom, serenading the ratz and batz with my endless miseries. ::sighz:: Always the bridesmaid...never the bride! ::weep, weep::

But enough about my sickeningly in-depth childhood fakeriez! If you could live inside any movie, what would you pick?!

19 comments:

Mel said...

Well, seeing as Facebook says I should be and they're never wrong about these things, I'm gonna have to go with "The Princess Bride". That or "My Fair Lady".

If it were gonna be a skeery movie, though, I'd probably go with "Pan's Labyrinth" or "Eskalofrío". Pa' practicar gritando en español, sabes. Or maybe "Jeepers Creepers", just so's I could save Justin Long and he'd be my sex slave fo'evah.

Polt said...

I'm tempted to list any number of gay pornos here, but I don't want to contribute to the message that gays are slutty whores.

So instead I'll say I'd like to be in Superman Returns. Not AS Superman, not even in a speaking role. I'd be happy just to be one of the random citizens of Metropolis, standing around when Superman does...well anything. Cause how awesome would that be to actually SEE Superman...well do stuff. The fanboy geek in me is orgasming at the thought.

Then i WOULD believe a man can fly.

HUGS...

john said...

Josh, Lock and Shock are siblings I believe. Why would they be dating? Or is this just part of your fantasy your rules? I mean rulez? I LOVE that movie and totally have the soundtrack on my iTunes.

I'd go with Dune, the miniseries, not the David Lynch movie.

Melody, Destroyer of Dreams said...

I'd totez be in Gone with the Wind. I so desperately want to pretend that I am Scarlett and wear her amazing outfitz. Also, I'd get to marry Clark Gable.

David said...

I never really thought about it before, but I'm torn three-ways for the ideal movie to live in.

Part of me would like to be in some crazy sci-fi future world like Logan's Run.

I also think it would be cool to be in a disaster movie world, like Earthquake.

Then, of course, there would be the musical world like Godspell or Fame (the original, puh-lease).

Tam said...

Star Trek, pretty much any Star Trek and while I love Nightmare I don't want to be in it. I would kill to travel to other planets and through space (and time thanks to worm-holes and other coolio spacey things).

Probably Next Generation though. It seemed very civlized.

Oh, David's mention of Fame (the original as he notes) would be cool. I loved that and could sing and dance through amazing movie magic. Fame in Space. Yeah. :-D

Polt said...

Tam: Fame in Space, reminded me of Pigs In Space from the Muppet Show. A dancing singing pig on a ship hurlting through outer space...that's got Oscar written all over it, eh? :)

HUGS...

Jere Keys said...

X-Men. And since it's not a musical, we'd have to write in the character Dazzler (can convert sound waves to light) and I'd be her awesome singing partner with the mutant power to make anyone feel what I wanted them to feel when I sang.

vuboq said...

Wait. I am confused. Be in or live in?

I would totally be in "Legally Blonde." Elle Woods and I are meant to be BFFs 4EvAH!

To live in? I would definitely join Tam in the ST:TNG universe!

Polt said...

Jere, I think we all already DO feel that way when you sing...especially when channeling Lil Kim. It's goosebump inducing. :)

HUGS...

Tam said...

Vuboq: We could just hang out in 10 Forward and get sloshed everyday on Orilian martinis and flirt with cute ensigns. I'd be up for that.

Michelle M. said...

Precious - It's the feel good movie of the year!

http://mmckee.net/pictures/precious.jpg

Tam said...

Very funny Michelle. Love Arnold and Webster.

that's J-O-S-H said...

Mel: So in "Pan's Labyrinth," would you be one of the monsterz that eat fairies, or just one of the fairies dat get eaterz?!?

Polt: Gay porn?! What's dat? Is Superman actually cool? Peepz alwayz go on 'n' on 'n' on about Batman and Spiderdouche, but I never hear much about SuperHombre. Enlighten me.

John: No, they are not siblings. They are described as a "trio of trixor treaterz" wiffout any sort of blood relation whatsoever. In "Kidnap the Sandy Clawz" they refer to each other as "cohorts." I know I've called my siblingz plenty o' weird tingz, but never that!

Melody: Yeah, you play [read as: are] are pretty mean bitch.

David: Oh DISASTER MOVIES! Since you are smart and know everyting about Broadway, can you write, direct and star in the theatrical musical production of "2012" wiff me as any role that is dramatico enough to win me a Tony?

Tam: Tinking about Tam floating in her tin caaaaaaaaan up in space, singing her lungz out, puts da biggest grin on mah goofy face.

Jere: You would make people feel strange & wonderful [read as: touching & sad!] emotions via ur music? So "Dazzler" is a stand-in name for Taylor Swift/Michelle Branch/Maria Mena/Vanessa Carlton?!

VUBOQ: LEGALLY BLOND: THE MUSICAL?!?!? I WANT TO START IN THE BIG SCREEN ADAPTATION!!!! [hence all da CAPS]

Michelle: For serial, that's one of the greatest fuzzing tingz I have seen in forevz. Damn, you really ARE better than me @ everything! ::swoooooon::

hoteltuesday said...

They should make a live action version of this movie and have Joni Mitchell play Sally. PERFECT choice.

And I would want to be in Precious obviously.

Ray Avito said...

I want to live in a world where I can watch and stalk irrelevant but insanely popular talk show host SJP and have Jack as my fun and crazy president. I'll take Mars Attacks!

john said...

Josh, at one point, I thought Jack referred to them as Oogie Boogie's kids...I also believe the line is "We're his secret henchmen and we take our job with pride. We do our best to please him, and stay on his good side." Oh wait, later she does say she wishes her cohorts weren't so dumb....And calling your sister a cohort would be better than what you just called her!

Michelle M.: If there is something wrong with you, I don't ever want you to be right.

Chris D. said...

It is very hard to choose just one movie world I would want to live in. There are a number that would be interesting to experience.

I might like to be in a Horatio Hornblower movie. Mostly for the vain reason that I suspect I would look quite dashing in a white puffy shirt with a formal navy waistcoat.

that's J-O-S-H said...

Enrico: I'd lurrrve to be in a move mash-up of "Precious" and "Drag Me To Hell"...like right when I steal mah azz some chix, a gaping, fiery hole opens up underneath me and I finally have mah dream come true!

Ray: feat. mass destruction?! Sign. Me. Up!

John: They call them "Oogie's boys," like his hitman. Plus, they can't be related...witchez, skeletons & devils all have different bloodlinez!

Chris: Smart of you to be cognizant of the attire you'd have to wear...cuz, lookz ARE everything.