Friday, October 9, 2009

We were warned?! Hurray!

During my lengthy bus ride into Nueva Nueva during the week, I like to take note of the rando billboardz and ads hung up en route to and in the city. During the past week, I awoke right before entering the Port Authority to find mah peeperz staring confusedly at this ominious Godzilla-sized advertisement:


"HUH?!" I found mahself barking out loud (thus waking up my slumbering neighbor). I immediately vommed in my mouf thinking that this was yet another alien/ginormous monster movie. District 9 was the shit and Cloverfield gave me a week long erection, I don't need another fix in those regardz! But I did like the ad demanded of me and I searched "2012" when I got home.

Turnz out that this is when the world is gonna end. We're all gonna die when the Apocalypse begins on December 21st, 2012 and Hollywood has decided to make some money off of our fear before hand. Apparently (and I'm basing this solely off of watching numerous trailerz online), a million comets will hit the Earth and tidal wavez will get us all wet/drowned and the Earth's crust will crack and Justin Guarini will release another album. Oh that last one seemz funny? That's just what my Apocalypse feelz like. I lurrrve mah ass some good Hollywood disaster moviez so 2012 is just what my demented heart has been waiting to spread its legz for! Seems that the producer of this film also produced and directed that awesomely inaccurate computer graphix wet dream known as The Day After Tomorrow which is more or less the exact same movie as 2012.

I don't care though! Give me global catastrophe [feat. juicy shots of famous landmarks being destroyed by storms/asteroids/tsunamis] and I'm in brainless Hollywooooood heaven. Who is gonna go see it with me when it comez out November 13th?! Take a look @ this tragic yet awesome teaser trailer and then tell me that you aren't also soiling your loinz in excitement! Weeeee! Chaoz!



13 comments:

vuboq said...

ZoMGz! I totes *heart* disaster flix, too! Yayz!

Michelle M. said...

This is definitely something I would want to see on the big screen.

hoteltuesday said...

DECMBER 21st?! At least I'll have my birthday presents.
MY (favorite) Apocalypse would not feature a Justin Guarini CD! Instead, it would feature a lack of "Christmas Magic" aka what is the point in living w/o creeper Santa molesting Aliana feat. glitter swirls??

Milo said...

Looks similar to Day After Tomorrow. Which I quite liked.

Polt said...

I don't think the Mayan calendar ending in Dec 2012 has anything to do with coments or tidal waves. I think it indicates that Sarah Palin is gonna win the presidency in Nov 2012, and that my friends, would surely be the end of the world as we know it. :)

Although the movie does look a bit more exciting than that. :)

HUGS...

that's J-O-S-H said...

VUBOQ: "Armageddon" was also a great film. What with the end of the world and Ben Asslick dying and Steve Tyler singing.

Michelle: Get ur bum over here to Jerzee and see it with me!

E. Copterz: And the monster reindeer furry and rapist demon snowman (feat. Ali's too-big-for-her-head eyes and GAP Kids catalog outfits)?

Milo: I think's apocalyptic that Bristol's pump daddy is gonna be posing for Playgirl...a magazine that I didn't actually think was real.

Tam said...

Well, I don't really care what happens in December as long as Canada wins the Olympic hockey gold medal (boys and girls) in Feb. 2012. I'm buying my red Canadian maple leaf Olympic mittens very soon. After that? Meh.

But it does look interesting. It's always the Buddhist monks, I think they are behind it all. We watch DAT on a regular basis, but then its got Jake Gylenhaal doesn't it?

Anonymous said...

I. am. there. Name the time and the place!!! Soooooo excited, I watched a documentary about the Mayan calendar a while ago, it is so far advanced that it actually makes predictions; it still trumps the modern calendars of today. However, I believe it has more to do with the world ending because of human behavior. But what the hell! Throw in some mass devastation served straight up from outer space and mother nature! The movie promises to be a lot of fun. Hmmmm....me, you, Mel and John hanging out at their place and seeing the movie???!!

-Cindy

FitzLikeaGlove said...

we're seeing this, bt-dubz

David said...

A week-long erection? Aren't you supposed to contact your doctor after just three days?

Melody, Destroyer of Dreams said...

omg YES! I love world destruction movies!! This one also stars one of my favorite geeky heartthrobs---John Cusack. Who doesn't love him?! Woody Harrelson is also in it which makes NO sense to me-about as much sense as Cusack being in it actually-but I'm all for it! So you, me, Cindy, John all get wasterdz at John's and my place and head over to the movie, afterwards we commence the wastedness.

that's J-O-S-H said...

Tam: The world could end for serial tomorrow, as long as I get to have a night of Brokeback bitch loving con el novio de mis sueƱos, Jake Gyllenhaal!

Cindy: Sure the Mayans had an advanced calendar...but now they're all dead, so I don't trust their shit for a minute (aka yes I do and I am terrified).

David: NO! The tsunami that came gushing out of mah pantz when the Statue of Liberty got beheaded was the greatest feeling I have ever experienced.

Mel: That's a genius plan. I see that college education came in handy.

Ray Avito said...

As soon as I saw that trailer with the aircraft carrier crashing into the White House (!!!), I was like, no way am I missing this craziness...

The clip you selected here just gave me the good kind of heart palpitations...