Friday, August 28, 2009

Wordplay!



As any good bloggy friend should be aware of, whenever a gringo attemptz to leave a comment on an entry, they have to type in a rando series of letters to prove that they are indeed flesh & blood and not robot SPAM monstaz. And sometimes the results are hilarz! I have noticed many times that peepz will include the Word Verification as part of their post, to highlight the especially silly codes. Well, since I am smart (read as: borrred) and all about communal posting, I thought it would be fun if we all shared these codes and made up funny yet nearly believable definitionz for them [sowwy, I was an English major and dis is what fun is to me!]. It's like that stupid game Balderdash that no one ever seems to be good at!

I did six to start it off:

Hupering (verb): Rattling on and on about stupid shit [IE politix, the weather, personal problemz] that no one cares about, oblivious to the fact that no one else is listening.

Example: Marjorie would not stop hupering on about her daughter's abortion during the ladies' luncheon.


Adolli (noun): The foaming device on cappuccino machinez that never fudging workz and ends up burning your hand when you try and steam milk into the cup.

Example: As to be expected, Mikaila received third-degree burns when the adolli malfunctioned and sprayed her with hot, venemous foam.


Gumis (noun): The nasty pasty shiz that forms on yo teefz if you don't brush/floss for a day.

Example: The dentist had to take a chisel to Mitsy's teeth to get all that nasty ass gumis off of her choppers.


Fluteli (noun): The token unattractive drunk ho that always ends up going out with you, gets hammered, stripz in public and singz Kelly Clarkson songs out of key, thinking she's talented because she took choir in high school.

Example: Even though she had sung "Since U Been Gone" six times already that evening, Tia was too sloshed to realize how much of an annoying fluteli she had become.


Scrab (verb): When pretending to be a decent cook, you rummage through the cabinents and/or fridgerator and arbitrarily pull out spices, sauces, vegetables, meats, etc. and dump them into a pot [aka every recipe in the Josh Is Trashy cookbook]. When asked what you have made, you always respond with "Casserole" (or "Stew" if you are more refined).

Example: Felix feared that he included Windex in his stew while scrabbing for ingredients. It was the only explanation as to why all of his guests got violently ill and started vomming up glass cleaner after dinner.


Retato (noun): The musical term for a part of a song [usually the chorus] that is consistently sung repeatedly at bars because people are too stupid [aka not Josh, Val or Enrico] to learn all the lyrix.

Example: The fluteli in Marissa's entourage kept singing the retato of "Who Let the Dogs Out?" until Michael kicked her in the face with his boot. [double pointz for using two wordz!]



Now it's your turn! If you don't see the Word Verification box, you are probably logged into Blogger and have to sign out in order to see it. Help me rewrite the dictionary! And get your friends to as well...how embarrassing would it be if no one responded to this entry?! VERY!


15 comments:

hoteltuesday said...

stwasoo: (adj). something that is lame, despite back-breaking attempts at making it good. Motivation/hard work - talent = stwasoo results.

Catie threw a knife at Jojo after she handed in a stwasoo poem that she apparently had been working on for the past four years.

Jere Keys said...

befecti - a person who makes no effort to change anything about the circumstances in which they find themselves; one dedicated to a life of extreme passive non-influence.

ex: He could have said something or just left the Lady Gaga concert at any time, but he was a total befecti, just sitting there as if he had no choices

Tam said...

Gamact: A fur ball similar to a dust bunny but significantly larger found in college dorm rooms inhabited by law students.

Jere may have been pulling off straight A's but his friends were stunned by the sheer number of gamacts in his room.

Tam said...

In a recent discussion on a friend's blog about foot-to-crotch rubbing (don't ask) her verification word was pubes. How great was that.

dusa: the headscarf worn by Romanian women while picking turnips in winter.

It was so freaking cold even Magdalena's dusa couldn't keep her ears warm. God damn turnips.

Michelle M. said...

singlyal - a monologue in which someone bemoans the fact that they are doomed to be single forever.

Josh had too many rum and cokes last night and launched into a drunken singlyal. It took us 2 hours to talk him down.

Jere - some of my closest friends are befectis : ).

Anonymous said...

thwinfa: an old gnarled woman who constantly nags all those around her while simultaneously forgetting things she's said less than 10 seconds ago

We sat down to lunch with this thwinfa, only to be bombarded with rageful ranting on constant repeat.

David said...

Theabo: The opposite of a theater queen, a lesbian who lives and breathes theater.

Jesus, that bull dyke fluteli at Marie's Crisis last night thought she was such a theabo, but she could only sing the retatos. I wanted to kill myself, but instead of being a befecti, I just left early.

And Michelle, that was genius.

Polt said...

Unfecing: combining the words 'fucking' and 'unbelievable' to mean something that's just fucking unbelievable!

Lady Gaga is higher on the charts than Muse? That's just unfecing!

HUGS...

that's J-O-S-H said...

These are all amazing! Keep going. Prove to the Interwebz that we are funnier than everyone else!

Creldo: The derriciouz and nutritious soapy soup water that brews in the kitchen sink when you leave pots "soaking" for three weeks. Try dipping Triscuitz in it!

Example: The creldo Mama was brewing was seasoned with three-day old chunks of mac-and-cheese.

Jere Keys said...

Fabrico: I assume this is actually Enrico's secret drag name from the wild double life he hides from us.

Did you see Fabrico lip-syncing to Britney in that skanky costume last night? She was messy wasted and hanging all over the go-go boys.

Julia said...

ingsocr (noun.)- the substance that is produced when someone vomits all over innocent bystanders after eating too many jello shots.

example- This dumb bitch got her ingsocr all over my sparkly princess dress. These good-for-nothing assholes should really learn to handle their alcohol!

hoteltuesday said...

dialysa - a medical condition (disease) that makes people think they have lovely singing voices, when they really sound worse than Adam Lambert.

That dude singing in the bowling alley totez had dialysa! I had to say sayonara after he murdered that woman, then sang a glory note to mask her blood-chilling screams! Fabrico is so much better.

Polt said...

soferano (noun): someone who frequently ends up sleeping at other peoples houses, usually on the sofa. This does NOT denote a promiscious person, but generally someone who tends to drink a lot and pass out.

Sassy josh had too many cans of Old Milwakuee at my party and is now passed out on the floor. He's such a soferano!

HUGS...

that's J-O-S-H said...

Ungsphin (noun): The disgusting filmy kitchen residue left on the skin of poor, sweet restaurant serverz after they work doublez without the chance to wash between shiftz. Can often times lead to clogged pores and terrible acne (feat. self-esteem issues and the desire to grow patchy facial hair in an attempt to mask the blemishez).

Example: Josh could of peeled off the layer on ungsphin that was plastered onto his face after the ungodly Sunday double shift he unenthusiastically just worked.

Chris D. said...

sessenio - An Italian term for a fast and passionate make out session.

Ex: Mario and Ricardo were so in love that whenever they came together after a period of separation a sessenio would erupt.